"I'm your Teddy".........

.... I swear you cant make this stuff up.

Sunday the 9th of September. Palms were sweaty, nicotine was consumed, nerves were rattled and somewhere, very quietly a mouse bit the dirt. As the sun split the stones I was amazed that 13 of the 15 Cash League Finalists showed up on time and we got the game of the summer underway. Yup three months sloggin away at the cash tables for the precious 50 hours finally came to fruition. The line up was as follows, in no particular order:

Hank the Tank, Shogun, The Hulk, Moaner Lisa, Roadkill, Bob the Builder, The Pushmeister (cheers for that one Santos), Old Father Time, Pinocchio, Jimmny Cricket, Bo Kent, The Ewok, Nancy (oy bitch!!! Where are my photos????), Teddy Ruxpin and Chicken Little.

The cream of the crop, best of the best, or just saddo's who had no lives and spent it all here. (Which we love ye for, in fact we miss ye. sniff sniff)

Yoda and myself were on hand to cause carnage and carnage we did indeed bring to the table. The first player out was old father time but we also lost Jimmny Cricket in the same hand! Old Father Time raised to 200 (blinds still 50/100), Teddy Ruxpin calls, Jimmny moves all in. Now it should be mentioned that my table was the tightest table known to man on this green earth. Old Father Time disappears into the tank and eventually moves all in as well. Jimmny has him covered, Teddy has them both covered and calls. Oi! Jimmny has pocket 10's, OFT has AJ suited in hearts and Teddy shows the cowboys. Flop comes King high and the others dont improve. Well thats a little lie, Jimmny did hit his set on the river but by then Teddy's army of Cowboys took control and shot everyone up.

I do believe Roadkill went next when his all in with a paired 10 on the flop was called by the Pushmeisters gutshot. No prizes for guessing whether he hit or his gutshot or not. Between the here and there of it we lost track of who went next as Elvis, the reigning Tournament League Champion decided to pay us mere mortals a visit. He perched himself on Bob the Builder's shoulder and became something of a good luck charm when the following conversation was overheard:

"Why are you sitting here?"
"I'm your good luck charm. You know the teddies that people bring to tournaments on telly. Well I'm your teddy."

Much scratching of heads and open mouthed-ness took place. "I'm your teddy". Well well well.
Before the final table we also lost Moaner Lisa and Pinocchio. Most people believe it was to Shogun who was performing his best impression of a hoover as he was sucking all the chips up.

Top four getting paid as follows:

1. €2,200
2. €1,300
3. €1,000
4. €500

A deal was struck where 4th now got €300 and 5th got €200.

The results of the final Table were as follows:

1. The Ewok
2. Nancy second Nuts
3. Shogun
4. Bo Kent
5. Bob the Builder
6. The Push Meister
7. Hank the Tank
8. The Sulk
9. Teddy Ruxpin
10. Chicken Little

Yes as you can see that was a Cahir Top four. Congrats to the lads and well played by everyone. Things got interesting in the top three when the following hand developed.

Shogun turns top two pair and Nancy turns top pair with a flush draw. Shogun's wondering how he's going to get paid and pushes. Nancy believes she's miles ahead and calls. She cant believe it when Shogun turns the two pair but the river rears its ugly clubbed head to give Nancy the flush. If you come to the club within the next few weeks you might still be able to make out the chalkline on the pavement from Shogun's exit. Eeeeeeep.

Heads up went as heads up usually do. Chips were passed, eyebrows were raised and many poker faces were displayed. The Ewok crippled Nancy when his 69spades flopped a flush against Nancy's A6hearts. The finishing had was as follows:

Ewok AJ Nancy Q10

Flop: 6,A,4

Turn: 4

River: 5

All over. Again congrats to the boys and send me on those Pics. Props to Chicken Little for being the onsite photographer. God knows how the photos are going to turn out. Mmmmmmmm spare ribs!

As most of ye might not know a new league started that very night and with The Gentleman, The Pushmeister, Shogun, Bo Kent, Bob the Builder and Sundry the game was absolutely nuts!! It started out its short life as a Holdem game, which turned into a Round of Each game which then evolved into an all Omaha game!!!! Madness??????? I think we swam through the pool of madness into the ocean of the ridiculous and drifted there for a while.

The game was going well until yours truly, after a wee little nap, took the dealers chair and apparently flopped the Pushmeister the nuts every hand. He ran riot over the table for, count em, seven hands. There was no beating him until Bob the Builder pushed with his house of sevens going up against Pushmeisters house of 10's. All was going as planned for the Pushmeister until the river came. Are you at all surprised that it brought the case seven? Maybe I shouldnt have naps before I deal anymore for there the game ended. Sniff sniff.

Anyhoo we are back to normal here at the K&K. Small bits of news:

New Cash League is already underway. Same structure as previous league.

Tournaments from next week will start at 9pm. No excuses.

Blonde Poker up and running in the Club by next Monday (pinkie swear)

So I think that about covers everything for now. I shall check over things and let ye know what the hissy haps is.

til then I bring you peace, love and the worst rivers you ever did see.

Love

Caboose

***Tip of the day: Hell hath no fury like a woman's scorn for sega!

"Clonmel man raped by Granny"

Bi line reads “I had a two!!”

Most of ye will probably be baffled by this headline. Some won’t. For those of you who are currently scratching the ole noodle, let Caboose enlighten you. (It really does get worrying when the authors start referring to themselves in the third person. And in plural form. Oh dear) Anyhoo as most will know we had our second big (yup we have its baby brother on every Friday night at 9pm.) Scalp tournament on Sunday. We had 2 from Cork, 5 from Carlow, a few from Cahir, 1 loner from Carrick and quite a large contingent from Waterford. Clonmel seemed to be lacking in numbers. We’ll address that later. Hmm hmm. Anyhoo there were 22 runners for yet another enjoyable Scalp tourney and it was eventually taken down by one of the Big Slick Doozers. I like to call him the Fish but he gets upset over that so I will have to stop. Some call him Spud, others call him Smurf. I shall call him Caramon. (If anyone can put this one together then I will give you a cookie!) Top three were getting paid in the following structure.

1. €1,100
2. €660
3. €440

Needless to say a deal was done and €200 was going to go to fourth. Don’t forget those scalps either. They make a nice little cushion for the ole prize money. Indeed. The intrepid 4 were on a break and I said I would sit in to give Lina a break. Those of you who don’t know Lina or weren’t there on Sunday, tsk tsk. So we started back and it took me about 10 minutes to bring carnage to the table. In fairness though I said I would before I sat down. Cobra went in fourth, followed, in the very next hand, by Bo Kent/Clark Duke and it was down to Caramon and A-man-who-can-do-nothing-for-an-Avensis. At this point the delightful Lina took over and I missed the fricking last hand!!!!!! Booooo! I do know that Caramon took the victory, the prize money and the last Lingerie Catalogue.

While this massive skirmish was taking place on our tournament table a mighty cash game had developed quietly in the corner. It wasn’t to be quiet for long though. You’ll understand when you read the guest list. On this very table sat the following renowned players

Mary Poppins
Sideshow
The Diamond Cerebrum
Shogun
The Gentleman
The Cork Rock
The Sulk
Old Father Time
Teddy Ruxpin
Gearhead

Players dropped but the main line up didn’t really change. Hank the Tank sat in as did Jimmny Cricket and Bo Kent. I’ve said in the past that we’ve had some games up there but this was one of the best I had seen in months. Credit goes to all players who were involved. There were no problems and everyone was civil to everyone else and the game was much more enjoyable as a result. The crackers, scones, tea, coffee and soup miraculously stayed off the floor for the entire duration.

Mary Poppins was in attendance again and kept the whole table going as always. The Sulk was seated on her left and they got involved in quite a few pots together. Her name should technically be the River Queen after all the rivers she caught and naturally she caught them against the sulk. The tone of the game was so positive that he brushed it off and kept on playing. The immortal line, uttered by none other than the Sideshow, came when Mary Poppins hit the river against him for about the 5th time in as many hands.

The bi-line from above stems from this phenomenal cash game. It should come as no surprise to learn that Shogun was involved in this hand. I didn’t deal it so I don’t know who the other two individuals were. The action is checked to Shogun who bets. No shock there then. But wait, Clonmel’s favourite move, the Sandbag, hits. He’s raised. More sandbagging as this raise is reraised. Suspense, drama, kids wetting beds, sweaty palms, c’mon Hollywood’s got nuttin on these guys. Shogun folds. The initial Raiser folds. Conversation ensues. Whispers of a flush, or even a straight at least can be heard across the, by now very desert like, table. It is at this point Shogun very gracefully announces; “I had a two”. Jaws dropped, heads are scratched, confused kids who didn’t know whether or not they should have wet their beds or not go ahead and wet them anyway.

We did have another great feud on the table and I was going to devote a separate blog to it but I’m sick and stuck at home with no internet access so this is all you’re getting (sympathy votes!!!). I shall refer to it later.

Right then back to business. Prepare for the scolding. My sleeves are rolled up, my wooden spoon is at hand and I’m ready to deliver swift justice. “Wassssss he talkin’ aboot eh?” What am I talking about!!!???? Where the hell were ye!!!!??? We run these tournaments for ye! Our own players. I know two people who got back to me with work excuses and I know one was genuine as he has done very well in the big tournaments and was gutted when he got the wrong Sunday off. Don’t get me wrong, I was happy with the tournament. It was a great tournament and a great night in my eyes. The atmosphere was brilliant and everyone seemed to enjoy themselves. I just wished that we had our own players there to egg on as well and that ye experienced a good day and night of solid poker. I love seeing ye do well and I love being able to brag to everyone that a local player went really far. So remember:

Sunday 16th September, 4pm!!!!!

That’s the next one.

Now I must slip into story telling mode (this requires caffeine, nicotine and of course Freddie blaring away in the background accompanied by James and a few more) I hope I do this justice. Anyone who actually is completely lost by what follows and needs an abridged version leave a comment and I shall dutifully respond.

......Er this thing is growing into a mini novel so I shall publish it at a later date. Snoogins.....

So thats it from me
Love

Caboose

***Tip of the day: when going to a poker tournament try and get the right week, let alone day.

Uh, writers block? The Dog ate my results? Wanker's cramp????

Ok is there any chance ye bought any of those excuses???? No? Ok then *hangs head* Sowwwwweeee this is so late.

Well then a lot has happened since I posted. No doubt I have forgotten most of it so I'll just have to make stuff up.

One thing that definitly happened was the Royal Flush bonus was busted again!!! This time a gentleman from Waterford was holding K10 of clubs and naturally hit it on the turn. I knew as soon as it was won the gates would open for them. We'll probably be inundated with Royal Flushes for a long time. This came the night of the €120 scalp tournament which went down very well and is now being run every second Sunday. The next one is on the 26th of August. Get involved! Congrats to the Fish as he finished second again. He had a massive chip lead with 5 left and when he went heads up he ran into bullets and a two pair with K5. Unlucky but well done bro!

The Tournament League final is on this Sunday, the 19th. Excitement? Adventure? A Jedi craves not these things. As usual everyone is trying to get their points up but no battle is stronger than the one for first place. The Blessed One (who wishes his name to be changed to Elvis. see story below to catch up) and the Cyclist are battling it out for top spot and its getting close. With one more tournament to go, tomorrow, it is down to the wire!!!! Its actually worth coming in to listen to the slagging when one of them is involved in a pot.

On that note we finally have a saying that we would like to coin. I know everyone says it everywhere but both these lines have been uttered so many times in the last month that I think I cracked like an egg when one of them was uttered tonight. So tell me what you think. The Club's new slogan:

"I know I'm ahead, but I'll fold. I think I'm behind but I'll call"

We are also learning new things all the time in here. Old Father Time is a dealer's choice player and last wednesday the young uns from Cahir were hoping for a round of each. Since it was short handed I suggested that they make it two rounds of each. Now this got lost somewhere in translation. Immediately Nancy was like "Wha' like a round of Omaha and a round of 6 card and a round of Holdem and a.... and a...." After looking at him for several minutes a very slow careful noooooo escaped my lips and I turned to Old Father Time "How about it, oh elderyness, fancy teaching these boys a real dealer's choice game?" With an evil glint in his eyes, a smile upon his lips he nodded and the stage was set. You couldnt get me out of that dealer's chair with a crowbar!!!

Games like Bad Hand, Clock, Rolling Joker, Double Flop Bad Hand/Good Hand, 10 card Omaha were being thrown all over the place. Even a sneaky seven card stud game crept in, much to the boredom of everyone involved. The game of the night was definitly rolling joker. Whatta game!!!! We've nearly convinced OFT to move his dealers choice game into the club. Bring it on! Watching all the open jaws around the place is brilliant. Watch this space for that!

That night one of the biggest pots developed over the space of a split second. Naturally Yoda "The car crash expert" was dealing. Here's how it went. There were 6 callers preflop so the pot total was €12. Remember this number. The flop comes down Ad, Qc, 4d. Its checked all the way to OFT who bets €20. Fair enough. But then Bob the Builder moves all in for €100. It gets better. Nancy thinks for ages, gets off his chair and all and eventually calls. It falls to the Ewok who goes into the tank. I'm currently running behind all of them having a look at the hands and I disappear into the office to stifle a giggle. Next thing I hear call. I come back out. OFT has called out of turn while the Ewok was thinking. Mother of pearl! The Ewok shows me his cards. Kd, 10d. He eventually folds. The turn come Qd. The Ewok gets sick. OFT ships all in for the remaining €29. Nancy calls. This pot started out as €12. By the turn its now up to €370!!! Because it was so big and with the players involved they all flip up their cards. Bob the Builder has A4. Nancy has A4. OFT has AK!!!!! Some turn it pushes OFT in front. River yet to come. And up she pops.....the magical Queen. We nearly all pissed ourselves. You had to be there.

The Elvis blurb. (Its not really long enough to be called a story)

TBO is on the Elvis machine. Now he's pumped his little heart into it over the past few weeks, getting nowhere. He gets it all the way up to €100. The jackpot of €250 is only a press of one button away. He can gamble on high or low with the card thats showing. Its a King. There's only one card above it, an Ace!! I've never seen TBO back off from a gamble and jump around the place shouting what will he do! He eventually plays it safe and takes the €100. The tournament then starts and TBO's knocked out in the third hand and within seconds we can hear the King singing his little mechanic heart out. After only five minutes we can hear TBO sing his little heart out. He went on to win the Jackpot of €250 bringing his total winnings from one machine to €350 on one night. Not bad so as requested we now rename The Blessed One to Elvis. Well done mate!

Thats all the news from the Circle K. I bring you love, peace and socks with no holes

love

Caboose

***Tip of the day: Tie up your shoe laces

Royal Flushes, Low Sperm Counts and Homosexual Poker Machines.....

WTF!!!!! What a week. Yes I know its late in coming but so much has happened that its tough to keep up with. Never mind trying to remember everything. There were three highlights during the week and they are all mentioned in the title. First things first though.

"Here's the news, all the news that's new and improved and approved by the US army, the sweetest smelling army in the world"

Thats right, we're having ourselves a wee scalp tournament on Bank Holiday Monday the 6th of August. Doors open at 3pm and the tourney kicks off at 4pm. €100 + €20 scalp +€10 reg. Starting stack is 15,000!!!!!!! Half hour blinds all the way. Any questions, you know the mail address or you can contact me through the club number.

We had our royal flush bonus decimated by a certain Jimmny Cricket whilst holding Q6 off. The new royal flush bonus has a few bi-points that should be noted. You must hold two elements of the royal flush in your hand to actually get the bonus. Both the house and the players will contribute to the bonus as well. Every time you sit at a cash game for the first time you chip in €1. We will chip in as well and get it moving. All in favour say "Aye".

The homosexual poker machines are courtesy of our own Dale Winton. Whilst playing a his favourite machine inside he never got a gamble on a full house. Then the kicking and screaming began. I do sometimes wonder.

We have a name change as well. The Le Mons Little Mexican shall now be called Nancy. There are a couple of reasons for this.

1. Nancy is easier to type.
2. Poor Nancy cant stop being "outdrawn" and is constantly having to fold 2nd nuts. 1,2,3 awwwwwwwwwwwwwww.
   

nothing but love Nancy

*******************ROADKILL SUCKS!!!!!!***************************

Anyhoo currently sitting here watching Playboy tv. Now thats how Big Brother ought to be. Aw yeah!!!!!

Sorry about that just got a little distracted there by, ummmm, an advert!

Tourney leaderboard will be updated this week. Tis fairly close at the moment. I shall be undertaking the arduous task of updating the cash hours after I do this. They shall be posted on the notice board in the usual spot. Last count showed that 6 players have qualified with the cash pool over €2500. Nice! So it could be a six handed freeroll for that amount or you could get your cash hours in and make a game of it. The league final is on the 9th of September. Do it!!!!!

I'm actually going to leave the low sperm count story to the man who uttered those immortal words. Santos, the stage is yours.

So on that note I'm gonna say "Spider pig, spider pig....."

love

Caboose

*** Tip of the day: When you buy a car, make sure that its not an Giant Alien Robot.....hang on a sec!!!!! Make goddamn sure its a fricking Giant Alien Robot.

Biccit? Hug? Poetry????? Wtf!!!!!!

Wow! Almost 2 weeks since I posted. I did get complaints from two people that there were no updates. TWO!!!!!! Makes me feel so......... wanted. Ah well, I'm back now and my baby is still running so pinkies crossed she stays running long enough to finish this.

Ok there has been a lot going on and I guess I have been negligent in the ole posting so I think I might start with Sunday.

Sunday the 15th of July 2007; a bit wet as I remember.....

We ran a very successful €100 freezeout here on sunday. The DJ got a few heads up from Waterford and I managed to swindle a few up from Cork. We also had a strong local representation and so it was that 38 people braved the stairs (oh the stairs!!!!!!!!) and fought for pride, victory, soup & sausages and of course the €1500 first prize. Oh yes! The game was strong, the atmosphere was "sweet as a nut joey" and everyone seemed to be having fun. Even taking bad beats with a shrug of the shoulder and a nice sportsman like "well done". Now thats not to say that there were a few temper tantrums, this was a poker game after all and with a poker game come poker players. Nappies needed to be changed and babies needed to be burped. Enough of this gibberish, on with the results.

1. Caroline €1500

2. Johnny €1000

3. Jamie €500

4. Buddha €350

5. Mike K €250
6. Ron €200
7. Bosco
8. Enda
9. Jason
10. Gordon

I always said that I wouldnt use real names as not everyone is happy with that prospect so if anyone wants to know who these people are you know the email address. If you dont then shame on you!!!! Go find it! Congratulations to our own four players who made it to the final table. Props to The Fish, The Ewok, The Le Mons Little Mexican and of course The Moaner Lisa. This tournament may become a regular fixture so watch this space.

Two cash games kept us going until 10 in the morning and man was there some crazy action on it. I dealt so many suck outs, draws, basically everything except ye old Royal Flush. One of the highlights were Sideshow, Mini Tom Cruise and Nanny Ogg having a three way €2/€5 NL Holdem game for 2 hours!!!!!! Sweet jebus the calls that went on in that game were horrendous, not to mention the straddling!!! But everyone left the premises on their own two feet so it couldnt have been all bad.

Tuesday 17th July 2007; WSOP Final Table Party. Really!!!

Yup we had ourselves a little movie night. Only we werent watching a movie or eating popcorn. There were marshmallows though. Hmmmmmmm Maaaaaaaaarshmallows. We were watching the final table of the WSOP Main event live on the big screen. Now if you have been in the club then you would know the TV of which I speak so you wont be surprised to know there was a lot of squinting and "is that a club or a spade?" going on. A lot of players also realised that live poker is reallllllly boring to watch but in fairness they kept watching it. The fact that the play on the final table was as loose was amazing. They were obviously watching the players from this club and learning from them. (I love ye, please dont eat me!!)

Our regular Tuesday tourney was put on hold and we ran a €35 freezeout instead. Nice! We had 19 runners for this including yours truly. Sucked out on the turn this time by terrible play but then again when have I ever played a perfect game. See the cash game paragraph for evidence of this statement. There was something however that has to be said about this tourney. On this special night a special person won his first tourney in the club. Ladies and Gentlemen I would like ye all to applaud, cheer and shout Biccit! for our very own Don Santos (aka: Sack/The Big Show/The Big Dog/Elderberry/The Mediocre One/The walking movie spoiler/The Dirty Mars Bar/Shogun) Did I miss any????Congratulations.

Cash action flowed nicely as well. Yup having witnessed the loose play on the telly, being on tilt from the tourney, I decided to play the cash game Clonmel style!! Oh yeah me beeeeeeatchs! What does this entail? Well, several things are needed before you sit at the table.

1. A pair of testicles the size of grapefuits: (one pair of sports socks, check)
2. A complete disregard for money (lit a cigarette with a 20, check)
3. Being on tilt and complaining about everything (already well versed in both, check)
4. A deep sea fishing rod and line (oh check!)
5. A table to knock over drinks on (see the puddle on the floor? Check)
   

I then sat down and played the craziest poker I have ever played. One hand to note was against the reigning Champ (see above). On the small blind I look down at 83 off suit. Apparently this is known as the House nuts!!! Yippee-fricking-doo. So I call. The Champ raises. I call. Le Flop. 10,7,3. Yes I hit my 3. Now being in Clonmel frame of mind I do a quick mental dance singing "I've hit my three I'm ahead". The other voices in my head, the ones I normally listen to decide at this point to jump ship and take pride, dignity and sensibility with them. So with all those annoying things out of my head I push all in for around €45. Insta-call by the Champ who slaps 10,7 on the table. I dont even groan, I laugh. The laugh continues as the turn brings a 9. It stops when the river comes Jack. Holy Crap!!!! Yo Champ!!! You cant see me!!!!! Its sick. I mean that is just wrong. Ole wrong face McGinty. Then the Champ decides to give out to me (light heartedly) for my play.

Next hand someone called a relatively solid player the whole way down to the river on a gutshot. Which of course hit. Now if I really wanted to name names I would, however I dont think I really need to now do I? Pot & fricking Kettle my friend. Pot & Kettle.

So after donking off my chips (twice, to AK both times. WTF!!!!) I decide to retire for the night and go home and make sure my baby 360, which was returned to me was working properly. Good news, she's working fine.

Wednesday 18th July 2007; Hot as Hell!

Yup we had our usual €50 freezeout and I have to say the atmosphere was great again! Seriously something seems to be getting into the water as everyone seemed to laugh off bad beats and had fun! Even the Sulk was light hearted and blowing kisses to people! Sixteen "players" sat down for the war on felt and we did arrive at our victor. Yup, the one, the only, Don Santos (aka: Sack/The Big Show/The Big Dog/Elderberry/The Mediocre One/The walking movie spoiler/The Dirty Mars Bar/Shogun). Two nights on the trot Bo, nice one. Even though folding some hands actually made you visibly sick! Still, well done again.

A quiet cash game followed and the only few things we really learned from all this was that;

• Pinocchio is indeed the unluckiest players alive
• Its not a good idea to knock out 2 players in one hand. Doesnt sit well really.
• It was battle of the families tonight as The Brothers of the Ring fought the Brothers of the much Moping and Whining. (ye know I love it!!!)
• Oh and it is sometimes a good idea to fold top pair.

So that about wraps it up really. I'm sitting here bogeyed and ready to go home for some kip I think it is time to say goodbye....

....but one thing first. Did you honestly think I'd leave it out Berry? Biccit this, mofo! The title of this wee blog is about biccits, hugs and poetry. The reason for this is simple. Over the past three nights there have been certain hints that two players are going out with each other. This could mean trouble as collusion could become an issue. I first twigged to it when a certain someone declared that he would be lying in bed writing poetry about another player on the table. Hmm.

My second clue was when the same person spent a good 3 minutes describing the other persons ass!

Number three came tonight as they were sitting next to each other. There was arm rubbing going on. Now under no circumstances was anything in this last bit exaggerated in any way. I did however have the decency to leave out the hug bit, where size does matter apparently.

Guesses as to who our two love birds are to the usual address. This could be very interesting! On that note, I'm outta here.

Love

your friendly Caboose

PS The video attached to this post is all about Tilt. Its getting ye warmed up for the blog on Tilt which is coming soon.

*** Tip of the day; Romantic is using a feather. Kinky is using the whole goddamn Chicken!

We're back......again.....(pinkies crossed)

Okay folks. Something strange for you. This is gonna be niiiiiiice and short. No I havent run out of things to say. I have a whole two, count em, TWO bad beats for the poll at the moment. One from Roadkill and another from the Le Mons little Mexican. So I would say keep sending them in, but I think I'll have to do with please send them in.

Righty ho then its news time.

Sunday 15th July. 3pm. K & K Card Club Clonmel. €100 + €10 Freezeout.

Yup. We'sa hosting a wee small Freezeout on Sunday. The starting stack for this prestigious tourney is 10,000 chips. The clock will be a half hour the whole way through and of course there will be all sorts of lovely levels. Including the ever elusive 25/50 level. As with all sundays it is time and a half for any period sitting at a cash game. Hmmmm nice. See we spoil ye, we really do.

Fridays........ here I am putting my brain into overdrive about something to run on Fridays. Barring the full bar and the dancing girls (this would be for our benefit as well as yours) there was only one thing to pop into my mind. Yes, yes I know. The dancing girls would be nice but it aint gonna happen in the next two months. Ooh can you feel the hope building. "He said two months!!! Does that mean that he'll be getting dancing girls in in the next few months???" Hope springs eternal.

So rather than turning this place into Hooters we're going to try something new. A heads-up tournament. I'll be putting the structure together over the next few days and as soon as I come up with something decent I shall let ye know straight away. Any and all thoughts always welcome. Just drop a comment or an email.

Right then I have gotta pack up and go home to work on the cash hours for all the children who need to know!!!!

love

your friendly

Caboose

*** Tip of the day: If ye do indeed start emails with Dear Debbie or Dear Agnes then I will, and trust me on this, send them into a real Agony Aunt and sit back and enjoy the show.

Ok this is getting annoying now!!!

Since I have to listen to ye're bad beats and get to experience new and exciting ways of hearing about how aces got busted (sarcasm??? dont know the meaning of the word =o)) I'm going to inflict this tale of tragedy upon ye. My poor baby laptop has died again. Well to be fair now, she was murdered this time around. I had a really annoying time with 78 updates that refused to install so I took her to the Doc who "fixed" her last time, apparently. It was 5 minutes in that I realised that there was a storm on the horizon and things were not looking pretty. Upon explaining how she wouldnt allow me to change the Catroot2 folder and the Crptyoservices to see if I could get the bloody updates to install I was greeted by a blank expression. Ah, it was going to be one of those days then!!! Great! So after a half hour of fart arsing around he decided to restore her to an earlier point. Cool, could work. The point he chose was the one where he had just finished installing Windows the last time. Crap, this wont work. The result of this was watching as 2 weeks of hard work on getting her back to her former glory went buh-bye. Yup down to the basic foundation. Everything Kaput! Graham's blood pressure through the roof and images of me inserting someone's head in a monitor flashing through the air. So I am currently sitting in the office typing this on the most annoying keyboard known to man. Clackity clickity Clack!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

*******************************

Anyhoo, onto the news. Well well well if sunday wasn't a corker of a game. So much for starting early on a sunday! After sending out texts, getting texts, making calls and receiving calls I was expecting to get a cash game going by 6 or 7. Apparently ye all had other things in mind. So there I was sitting alone in the club and somehow kept sane until 10:30 when we managed to get a four handed game going. Then the weirdest thing happened. The doorbell rang and continued to ring until at half 11 we had a full table with 4 people waiting!!!! So two tables it was then. With a hold'em only table and a round of each table we saw some of the craziest action in a long time. Family pots for a straddle of 5 Euro (god this thing sucks so badly it wont even bring up the Euro symbol. Rubbish!!!!!) were a common sight and people trebling up with K8 off suit were seen as ok. The game was nuts, the players were crazy and we were all highly entertained throughout the night. But with great craziness come great bad beat stories.

I took the round of each table and Yoda took the hold'em only. Seated at my table were Hank the Tank, Le Mons Little Mexican, The Mediocre one (formerly known as Don Santos or Shogun or whatever I called him, he was also being called the Elderberry throughout the night due to a fetching purple number he was wearing. Biccit?), Roadkill, The Blessed One, The Voice (now this is a name he ordained himself, we shall call him The Hulk!!), The Gentleman. Yoda had Stretch, Pinocchio, Old Father Time, The Moaner Lisa, Mr Wait & Donate, Joe Serious and his mate Joe Useless. It was clear from the start that the two tables would probably declare war on each other over who was better and this brought an amusing anecdote which shall be told at a later date.

Getting off topic again. There was absolute murder on the bad beat scale of things which was strange because there were some cracking lay downs. Even the Mediocre one laid down the nuts in Omaha on the turn. Le Mons Little Mexican also laid down the nuts on the flop which turned out to be a "winning fold". Some great poker was on display and some shocking poker popped its head up every now and again. Stretch drifted over to our table at one stage and decided to inform us of his distaste for Omaha and how it was a stupid game. He straddled his first Omaha hand for a fiver!!!!! He played tight for most of the night, then again whats new. He then met the Elderberry in a hand that took a lot of people by surprise. It was raised preflop as usual and Stretch called with 8,8,x,x. The flop came 8,x,x (one spade). Elderberry bets and stretch decides to Pot it declaring that it was his first time all night in doing so!!! Le Elderberry calls. The turn brings another spade. The Elderberry bets and Stretch moves all in. He is of course called and naturally the 3rd spade comes up on the river. Elderberry called the flop with pocket Aces and one of them happened to be a spade which was suited with a wee little 7!! Yowzers! Man Stretch went on tilt.

Although prior to all this Hank The Tank went through a disastrous run of luck and had Stretch happily chirping in his ear that he was hitting some cards and doing really well. You had to be there. A very strange hand also occured around the time that Stretch was praising Hanks luck. It was raised preflop to 20 with 3 or 4 callers I think when it comes to Hank he raises to 100. Its folded all the way around to the Hulk who re-raises to 200 which means that Hank is all in if he calls, which he does. He's holding A,A,K,Q. The Hulk is holding K,K,x,x. So there we were all in preflop and the case King appears on the flop! Sick!

Action continued long into the night and it saw 4 men left at the table at 7am. The Gentleman, Le Mons Little Mexican, The Mediocre one and The Canon. Once the Elderberry ran away to do a personal errand (hope you werent shouted at too much Sack!) we decided to spice things up a bit. So to finish off we switched to a round of Pineapple and 6 Card O! Awwww yeah! It was half 9 when we eventually peeled our sweaty asses off the chairs and I'll tell you it was just so nuts I know for a fact that I'm leaving sooooo many things out. If you were there, if you're having flashbacks please let me know so I can chuck in a few more details.

Gotta run

love your friendly

Caboose

PS It was time and a half for the cash league on Sunday and every other sunday.

*** Tip of the day: If you want to put someone's head through a monitor you should. If you bottle everything up you could get ulcers and they're not pretty at all.

Whats that you say? You have a bad beat that I've never heard the likes of????

Mwah haw haw. I titter in your general direction if you really think I've never heard a bad beat like yours. Just let me clear up one issue now. Aces are indeed the best hand pre-flop. The most important word in this statement is "PRE". They are only a pair at the end of the day. Get over it!!!

Right then, on that note I have decided to run a little poll. Thats right a Bad Beat poll. Email me your bad beats to kkcardclub@gmail.com I shall post them here and we shall have a group "oooohing" and "aaaaawing" and we shall name a winner. We shall all chip in then to buy this poor soul a beer/bar of chocolate. So send em in.

Yes I know its been a week since I've posted and you know what, I'm ok with that. The Voice! I finally did figure out who you were and got it confirmed by your bro. Why not come back down every now and again for a live game? We havent had a "Hulk smash!" moment for a while.

Since this thread started out with bad beats we might as well keep on topic. Check out what happened to Old Father Time in the space of 10 minutes.

1. Old Father Time met the Blessed One with the following flop. 10,6,4 (2 clubs). TBO holding 44 and OFT holding J9 of clubs. We had an all in situation on the turn when the wee 2 of clubs popped up his head. And of course one of the other 3 remaining 2's popped up on the river.


2. Then 10 mins later Old Father Time moves in on the flop with A2 and gets called by the Cyclist holding 10,4. The flop you ask? A,10,2. The turn and river came runner runner 3,5. Yowzers!!!!!
   

We also had another interesting moment when The Bouncy Castle moved all in with AQ and was called by someone claiming they had "Jack Shit". I was instantly reminded of Evil Dead 3 when Bruce Campbell uttered the immortal line "You're leading two things right now, Jack and Shit. And Jack just left town". Groovy. So J8 is flipped over and of course hits two pair off the flop.

We also had a slow roll fest. When father meets son heads up on the poker table only bad things can happen. Yup thats what happened when Cobble and Cobble jnr were the last two soldiers at the Monday €30 freezeout. Coinkidinkly it was the last two hands where we saw father slow roll the crap out of his own flesh and blood. Jnr moves all in with pocket 4's and it takes a while for the pocket 9's to be flipped over. Then the next hand (which is also the last) we're all in on the flop. Jnr shows first again; AK and Snr shows over the ace and then the queen on a 3,4,Q flop. Somebody was walking home that night.

Now we move from Bad beats to bad calls. We had another Round of each cash game and I decided to sit in to keep it going. So there we were playing a nice easy game when the following hand materialises; the board is paired, so we have a quads/house possibility, there is a straight flush on board, which also means there are straights and flushes on board. So I bet the flop, bet the turn and pot the river. Now I have middle two pair but with the board I suspect I'm only getting called by a monster hand. No no no no Roadkill calls me with 2 pair. So sitting there confused about the call we go heads up again 5 hands later. The only difference is I dont look at my cards until the river when Roadkill bets out. Now here's the thing, again the board is paired and again there is a straight flush on board!!!! So I look at my hand and pot the bet boosting it up to around 50 or so. And he calls!!!!! With a straight!!! A straight that is just a fraction higher than mine!!! Mother of pearl!!! When asked how he made those calls I was expecting that he had a read on me or something. Nope no. He had two pair and he had a straight. Simple as. Tunnel vision in Omaha is a killer unfortunately in this case he was lucky. Let this be lesson to all.

It was also requested by the Mullet, who wanted it known that it as another Cahir 1-2-3 on thursday night. Now he wanted it to go down as an Epic Battle and even spelt it out for me; e-p-i-c b-a-t-t-l-e! wow!!!! what a kind idiot!!!! Now Epic battle is not how I'd describe it. From my point of view it was more like a grind.....a really long grind with no profit at the end of it. Except from the 60% Man, Cheers bro!!!

Thats all from this week.

love your friendly
Caboose

*** Tip of the day; Start drinking coffee or red bull or summit as another young player fell victim to not paying attention and slowing up the game or making a ridiculous call and getting ridiculously lucky.

Chapter 2...the beastie is dead! Long live the beastie!

Thats right. I know its late. Big whoop wanna fight about it?

Right, first things first I'd like a moments silence please. Those of you who dont know, my laptop died a death when I got hit by the most amazing virus I have ever seen. Stenography is a thing of beauty if its done right. So without having backed up in two months I had to relinquish her to a Doc who wiped her clean and reformatted her. Sniff sniff. She's getting better but she's nowhere near what she used to be. So don your caps and lets have that moment of silence.

**********insert moment of silence here***********

Ok now that thats covered onto the business at hand.

News:

Righty ho then. In order to let many of our brave jedi qualify for the wonderment of the cash league final we have decided to go crazy with the hours. The Le Mons Little Mexican came to us with a suggestion and we have decided to run with it. What is this marvelous idea you may ask? Well its simple really:

• As from Monday if you are sitting at a cash table (with a game going!!!) between the hours of 9pm and midnight you now earn 90 minutes for every 60 minutes you sit there.


• This crazy deal on minutes is availabe all night Friday night. From the start of the cash game to the end of the cash game. Any questions, leave a comment.
  

Le Cash league Final:

• Input on this is needed. The Cash league final will run on the week of the 27th August to the 1st of September.


• The final will be an early start as we want to run a long clock with plenty of play.


• I'm opting for Sunday the 1st of September. This way we can start at 3 or 4 and have a nice long game with plenty of side action going as well.


• If anyone knows of anything that may clash with this please let me know. I've checked all relevant hotel-poker sites and we seem to be in the clear.
  

In more global news, a young Irish man, Ciaran O Leary took home a nice pay day from the 3rd event of the World Series. Congratulations go to Ciaran and we hope he continues to do well.

Other Victors in the WSOP include Eli Elezra who took the pot for Seven-card stud Hi-Lo Split Eight-or-better. Yowzers!

Alan Smurfit also took the win in the Pot Limit Omaha with Rebuy tourney. Event number 33.

The World Championship HORSE event kicked off last night so can't wait for that one.

**********************************************************************************

Back to the club business. The €1,000 guaranteed €50 freezeout on Wednesday saw 27 young Paddywans coming to the felt with the 60% Man proving he may yet be 100%. Thursday saw 22 players hit the table and it ended up with 3 lads from Cahir going at it in a nice civilized game with no Bubble apparently.

I also had a strange night when, upon answering the doorbell, I was told that The Great One had arrived. I only saw a chin and realised that that certain jaw line couldnt be Batman, so that Great one was out of the question. There was also nobody in Wrestling attire or no giant transforming artic truck or no people with floppy haircuts. So as baffled as I was I was further baffled upon discovering that it was the Don himself who claimed he wanted me to let the great one in. Now being a practicing Atheist I do have some knowledge on the whole religion side of things and had assumed that the Don had gone off found God and invited him along for a game of Poker. To say I was disappointed would be an understatement. Twas only the Don himself and his "Great" ego.......... if you're going to kill me please make it quick!!!!!!!!

I supposed I had better put up some results for ye from the week:

Monday the 18th:

1. Caboose. Yup I out Blessed-ed-ed the Blessed one in the only hand I got lucky in. My A7 hearts ran into pocket 10's and while I was looking for an Ace or hearts I was surprised to hit a 7 on the flop and a 7 on the river. What makes it worse is that it could not have been the 7 of diamonds as TBO had the diamond draw. I believe thats what we call.... Eeeeep.
   
2. The Cyclist.


3. The Blessed One


4. The Former Champ


5. Family Guy
   

Tuesday the 19th:

1. The Cyclist; Split with his brother


2. The Spectre


3. The DIY Man. This was incredible. I tried to knock him out 5 times!!! 5 times! 3 times I was ahead and the other 2 times the least amount of outs I had was 10!!!!!!!!! How he didnt go on to win is beyond me.


4. Caboose


5. Family Guy

Wednesday the 20th:

1. The 60% Man: Q9 v 96; QJ10 9 J


2. The MP


3. The Ewok (y'all missed the singing Ewok and the near decapitation of the Le Mons Little Mexican. God bless his cotton socks and Matrix like reflexes)


4. Roadkill (back in business. The two week break seemed to do him well)


5. Moner Lisa

Thurs the 21st:

1. The Walking billboard


2. Chicken Little


3. The Mullet


4. The Cyclist


5. Hank the Tank
   

Right then that brings us up to date. As I type this there is a nice little Round of Each cash game going. Two of the original starters (at 9pm) are still here with the Don and the Fish!! Man there have been some swings and roundabouts in this game which saw the cyclist bow out early claiming the Omaha was a bit much. After suggesting they play it in the first place.

As ye know I want to make Sunday an Omaha Tournament. There are a lot of people wanting to learn it so a €25 double chance is the best way I thought of. I'll be here early on sundays, around 3ish, to accommodate early cash games or get that Omaha tourney rocking!!! Drop me a mail at kkcardclub@gmail.com if ye're interested.

Right then I gotta go as I have to redo the entire Cash league hours. Yup they were one of things I never backed up. Stoopid stoopid stoopid stoopid!!!!!!

love a very tuckered out

Caboose

*** Tip of the day: If you're not used to playing Pot Limit and hearing how much the bet is after shouting Pot gives you a heart attack then simply ask your kind, benevolent dealer what the pot would be if you wanted to bet or raise. A simple "Bet?" or "raise" will do. If you are feeling gentlemanly like you may also ask with the following line; "Excuse me kind, magnificient dealer but if I was to bet or raise the pot to its maximum amount, how much would that be?"

Day 23....shoot myself in the foot and go home.

Hey there sports fans!!!!! Right then straight down to business!

For those of you with any interest in the WSOP this year at all here's a few tidbits!

• As I write this Hellmuth has indeed won his 11th Bracelet and was presented it by Doyle Brunson and Johnny Chan.
• Johnny Chan is in the race for his 11th at a $1,500 Pot Limit Omaha tourney that started day 1 with 576 players and got down to 23 in the second day! Pot Limit!!!
• Alan Cunningham has also won his 5th bracelet!
  

If you wanna find out about any of your fav players then just drop a comment and it shall be posted here.

Onto last nights festivities.... Wow. There we were, Red and Myself sitting on our tods contemplating joining some cult in some forgein land when a few souls drift in off the streets. So we get on the horn to Yoda and Bob the Builder who are in some fine establishment perving on young women and getting themselves generally osified and tell them to haul ass up to the fortress of not-so-solitude. So to cut a long story short we did indeed have a game last night. Unfortunately for the Blessed One his lucky streak did not hold and even his mighty power, known as K9 off suit, was smashed upon the anvil of felt!! Aces were busted yet again and tears were shed over typical gutshot calls and people hitting runner runner.

In the last hand of the night all seemed quiet, not a creature was stirring, not even a Yoda! Preflop action saw no increase, even the flop saw a tumbleweed float across it. Then boom the turn hits bringing a straight on board. All of a sudden Bob the Builder and Hank the Tank went into a betting frenzy which ended up with Bob all in!!! It was an absolute car crash when the cards flipped over to show that Bob had the nuts and Hank had the second nuts!

Oh just to let ye know anyone can leave comments on the blog now...not just registered members so keep them coming in.

And here endeth the lesson......

Thats all from me folks, currently sitting in a little sit n go on my beloved laptop! Thats right I bit the bullet and decided to play online again. Woohoo. Caboose is back!!!!!

Love

Caboose

*** Tip of the day: Bulmers, Vodka, Redbull does not a good cash game player make.

Day 22....Escape is possible!!!!

Greetings young ones! I'm back! woohoooo....... a lot to catch up on in the poker world so instead of making this a lengthly blog i'm gonna tell you all about my holiday! Excited? Well I was in Germany for a concert. Germany is very well run, they have very good beer, their lesbians are some of the fittest lesbians I have ever seen and their brazillians aint all that bad either! There you go.

The End...........

Image above copyrighted to those brave boys from Red Vs Blue.

Anyhoo did you think I'd leave it go there???? I dont think so. Right while I was away there was poker played up in the club. That and rummy. Why oh why did I have to bring that game into the club. As I type this at half 6 in the morning there are 5 lost souls trying to play the game. Bless their little cotton socks. In the meantime I gotta update this wonderful and charming blog. Happy days!

News first:

Cash league is pumping along nicely. Just shy of €1,000 in the pot so far. Nice going lads. Remember anyone with 50 hours qualifies for the tourney final which is essentially a freeroll for whatever the prizepool will be. Stay posted for the date of the final. I promise to have it up here by Wednesday so ye can book holidays. But when it is posted on wednesday there's to be no "But but but but I booked a dirty weekend away with someone elses missus and its the only weekend we can get it on for a full 4 minutes!!!" Once the date's set, its set. Just takes a while to make sure we dont clash with anyone else. Your hours are available on request. 18 is the highest amount so far. Any questions on the league itself can be emailed to myself at kkcardclub@gmail.com or corner me in the club and throw Camels at me to appease me.There are also guidelines at the end of this page just over the video of one of my favourite hands of all times =o)

Some people were enquiring about a small tournament called the WSOP or something like that. The schedule we were talking about is as follows:

1. The H.O.R.S.E $50,000 event commences on the 24th of June


2. The World Championship Pot Limit Omaha $10,000 is on the 1st of July


3. The Big'un. $10,000 Main Event starts on July 6th and the final table is on July 17th.

So there you go. I will be trying to get the final table live on in the club from ESPN. Should be good crack. Will find all the details about it and let ye know. Its worth a watch as ye're sitting there eating choccie biccies and sipping on flat orange.

*****************************************

Today saw a cracking thursday evening of poker. 20 young paddywans sat down to begin their sparring. Yet again I was there to witness Skidrick's run of pure luck. In fact we're changing his name to The Blessed One. I have cracked Aces on many an occassions both on the dealer side and the player side but I must say this was one of the sickest crackings I've seen in a while. The Blessed One sticks in a small raise preflop and the Mullet reraises. TBO calls. Flop comes and again TBO bets. TM raises and TBO ships it all in. TM calls, leaving him with 50 in chips and flips over Aces. TBO flips over K9 off declaring he thought the young frizzy haired paddywan was "at it". Now at this point the only card connecting TBO's hand and the board was a 10 and a 6!!!! Sure enough TBO catches runner runner, in order, to fill a four card straight with his 9. Yowzers! It pretty much continued like this for the rest of the tourney really. Two more calls from TBO for gutshots hit and needless to say he went on to win the tourney. The exalted position of 'Top of the leaderboard' is just beyond the Blessed One's pudgy little grasp. But he is chasing. On the score card of McHammer and the Blessed One I think the Blessed one is ahead. Someone correct me on this?????

Other souls at the final table included, in their finishing positions;

• The DIY man in 10th


• The former Champ's cuz in 9th


• The Mini Goblin in 8th


• The Ewok in 7th


• MC Hammer in 6th


• The Champ Who Could Not Retain His Title For One Night in 5th


• Hank the Tank in 4th


• The Spectre in 3rd


• Condor Man in 2nd


• The Blessed One in 1st. All bow and pay hommage for he be'th a kind benevolent Champ

We also had a rocking Cash Game as well. With a waiting list. A W-A-I-T-I-N-G list!!!!!!! Grooooooovy. The mini Goblin, upon getting knocked out, asked whether or not was it a crazy cash game. Then proceeded to sit down and raise to €50 in his first hand!!!!!!! Eep. He took it down with that bet though in fairness. Wait and Donate put in an appearance as did Chucky from All Grown up who apparently did very well in some card club in Cork. I made the mistake of asking what he played meaning tournament? cash game? what type???? The response was simple...... He played Poker!!! I swear.......one of these days....mumblemumblemumblepokerplayersshouldbeshotgrumblemumble.

We finished up the action at half 5 as most people at the table had work at 6!! God I love this town.

sorry about the length of the blog but its been a while and I do love the sound of my own....er...fingers off the keyboard? Anyone? no? ah well. Well to be continued tomorrow!!

Until then "Give them NOTHING, take from them EVERYTHING!!!!"

love

your friendly

Caboose

*** Tip of the day; Do not teach any of these bums a new card game. I should have been in bed an hour ago!!!!

Day 11, our unit's being moved......

That's right baby! I'm outta here. For a little break! I'm going to see General Tyler and his elite group of Soldiers. So this means, no blog for 5 whole days. Which means its like I forgot again already.

Anyhoo, unless I get booted from the Concert (which may happen) I wont be updating this wee little blog. Well, if I dont get kicked out of the bedroom as well. Then I'll be bored and nekkid and sitting in a German Hotel lobby surrounded by some of the most regulated people ever.

Onto tonight. There we were, sitting down enjoying our munch (Yoda makes a great housewife), expecting another quiet night as everyone in Clonmel seems to be consumed with this Tag Rugby lark when the door bell goes! Raggy? A veritable tour bus of people from Carrig arrived on the scene. Much scratching of head ensued. So the quiet "eh we'll get one table" turned into 20 souls sitting at the blue felt of hell. Too many new faces, too tired so no new names. Awwwwwww. I can tell you that the final three got paid and they included the Mullet, The Cyclist and a newbie from Carrig. Nothing special happened barring flush draws being the hand of the night. All night!

Take the number of suckouts, divide them by the number of cards dealt all tournament on two tables, multiply that then by the power of the number of people wearing underwear and you might get where my headache was.

So I take 5 minutes, roll up the ole sleeves and crack my knuckles and my butt cheeks in preparation for the cash game. Pinocchio and Jimny Cricket come in and sit down. Two minutes later the game is over! I got nowhere near it! waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaagh.

Which brings me to now, here I am on the eve of my great adventure watching Pinocchio and Yoda attempting to teach The Evil Twin how to play the new rummy on the scene. Does the phrase "The blind leading the blind" mean anything at all to you?

The cash league is pumping nicely, so do get your hours in. As there are still requests on how it works I shall upload the print out that can be found on the club pillar of fame.

Ohtay I think they're ready to lose some money. If i dont come home for any reason (pinkies crossed it will be due to abduction by hot Japanese women) I'll miss ye all.

Awwww yeah
C ya on da Phlip Cide.
Love
Caboose.

*** Tip of the day: Do not come into the club drunk and start pressing random buttons when I'm two away from Mammoth darts, and three nudges away from Barcrest. I will kill you.

Days 5-10....Held captive by the Enemy!!!

I'm sending this out a week late!!! a Week!!! I thought it was only a day or two. Soweeeeeeeee. I'm sure ye were checking everyday and making sure you were up to date on everything. Werent you???!!!!

Right then, quick synopsis on the past few days. Fri saw the start of the Bank holiday weekend which brings our busiest period! no really I mean we had, um, er a tournament.... in Gin rummy. The Omaha tourney was put on hold as it was scheduled without the Bank holiday in mind. What doofus had that idea? Twit!!!!!

I was blissfully off on Monday and Tuesday. I do believe there was a tournament on Tuesday even tho the Good twin had a leaving bash and we were all trying our best to help him go out in style. I know my liver went out with a bang. Last time I saw it it was having a cup of coffee with my lung which was having a cigarette. So the good chef has move to greener pastures.....100 metres down the road! Rumour also has it that a few people were busy attending a pub challenge in a place that shall not be mentioned on Monday. Turncoats!!!!

Which brings us back to today. There was indeed a €50 freezeout tonight and it also saw the return of Hank the Tank from his holliers where he didnt get run over by a Lambo! How the hell he managed that is beyond me as I nearly ate bright orange bumper when I was in the same place. Which goes to show that the people renting out the cars should really make sure that the people renting the cars should actually know how to drive stick!!! Right try and get off this tangent.

The brave souls sitting at the table, again in order of appearance were; Buzz, the 60% Man, Bob the builder, Skidrick, The Pampers baby, The DIY man, Hank the Tank, a very ill looking yoda, Family Guy and the wannabe dealer. We only lost one before the break. Yet again The DIY man claims that he doesnt mind going home early and yet again his wish is granted when he calls Skidrick's all in and runs into the nuts!

So we go on a break. I wobble my way through the break looking for my lung and liver. There is a reward for anyone who returns them to their home. Then we all sit back down to the table and boom! Everyone starts dropping like flies. 1st to go is Family Guy quickly followed by the 60% man. Then yoda manages to triple up with A3 of diamonds against AJ and JJ!!!! Not only does he hit 2 pair on the turn he rivers the nut flush. The luckiest little jedi in the world. Until about 5 minutes later when he eventually bowed out. Hmmmmm weak in the force is this one =o).

Top 2 are getting paid and Hank the Tank resumes his title as Bubble boy so we're left with Skidrick and the wannabe dealer. Heads up is pretty much Cat and Mouse for a while as the two intrepid explorers feel each other out. They also played poker during this period. It comes to an end when Skidrick took the title and the tourney by flopping a small set of ones.

Onto the cash game which contains strange characters such as the Wannabe Dealer, Bob the Builder, Skidrick, Pinocchio, MC Hammer, Beaker on steroids, Hank the Tank and the Family Guy. People are busting out left, right and centre as nearly everypot is over at least €40 preflop. There were two hands from when I sat in that were not raised preflop. Basically the whole game can be surmised by the following statement: "Yup, two blinds, two straddles. Oh dear" It ended pretty quickly as no one could keep up with the barrage of monster pots. All good but it would have been better if it carried on. Beaker on steroids went to the bank and hasnt been seen since. Any information on his whereabouts can be reported to us here at the K & K Card Club or in confidence to this blog!

Anyhoo I'm still sick as a dog, half of this blog probably doesnt even make sense. and well I very badly need sleep. And a liver transplant. And a new lung. And.......

love,
your friendly (yet slightly ill)
Caboose

*** Tip of the day; It is not a good idea to pick up a case of beer and bring the party back to your place!!!!!!

Day 4.....camped on enemy shores!

Thursdays tourney seems to be one of the most popular tourneys. Now if only we could get to the bottom of that, well, we'd be at the bottom of it. Which also reminds me how much Thursday nights up here seem to be turning into Gay night!!! The Le Mons Little Mexican even wanted a shy Ewok to take a walk with him. Awwwwww isnt that cute!!!

There were shed loads for the tourney, a few familiar faces, a few new faces. Not everyone is "getting a name" as its now called in the club, as I didnt deal to everyone tonight. Apparently there was a special request for one of the new faces to be called Chicken Little whereas he suggested "loose and horrible" himself. A loose horrible Chicken Little????? I'll leave this one to the panel.

Since I dealt the final table I'll tell you who made it. In order of seating; Our newest Thousandaire, The Mullet, Boromir, Roadkill, Skidrick (who had a €20 bet with Mc Hammer that he would indeed make the final table), The Cyclist, Strawberry Shortcake, Mc Hammer, Colin Montgomery and The 60% Man. The action was pretty much ABC. There was quite an odd pot tho, Mc Hammer raises to 3,500, Colin Montgomery ships all in for a lot, The Mullet is thinking and disappears into the tank eventually coming up for air and folding, I cant remember who calls but Mc Hammer folds. The board comes down and by the turn there are two jacks and a whopping King on the river. Colin's 77 holds. The odd part about this hand is that the Mullet declares he had Queens. Not so odd you might think but he declares this to a spectator behind him and like a mexican wave every individual asks him what he had. Apparently the hearing factor is now officially gone out of poker. THE MAN HAD QUEENS!!!!!!!!!!!

Top three were getting paid and the bubble seemed to last forever. I'm pretty sure I slipped into a coma for a while as preflop action went pretty much like this: sb, bb, all in, fold fold fold. Now picture this happening for three quarters of an hour solid!!!!! I do exaggerate a bit, there were two all ins during this mammoth period that were called and needless to say people doubled up. Then The 60% Man took a hit and decided to push getting knocked out. We're finally in the prizes and it takes a while to loosen up but when it does the following hand happens. The Mullet (small stack) pushes all in, Skidrick (chip leader) moves all in, Colin Montgomery moves all in! So there we are, the hands respectively read; A8, 33, AK. The board reads: 4,7,K.......(insert long pause here for dramatic effect) 3, 2. Game over! Please insert coin. Skidrick takes it down there and then. In fairness he did declare as soon as he walked through the door tonight that he was going to win the tourney! Fair dues, he's a man of his word.

Anyhoo insert brief intermission for me til I get my hands on the now Omaha only cash game. Sweeeeeeeeeeeeet! Apparently Roadkill sat down and was out in 10minutes when his house ran into a higher house. Card Death still continuing. Keep your head up dude, it only took 7 months for mine to clear up and I'm still getting some aftershocks! So the stars of this merry gathering is McHammer, the horrible loose little Chicken, the 60% Man, the Le Mons Little Mexican, The Ewok and Family Guy. Its pretty much standard Omaha stuff. McHammer gets two horrific beats when both himself and the Ewok flop the nuts straight. They're all in and the Ewok has the higher straight draw which comes on the river. Ouch! Then Mc's nuts straight runs into a flush draw which also hits on the river.

There was plenty more carnage on the table when it was announced the the Le Mons Little Mexican wasnt going to be staying much longer as he had to drive 600 miles the next day. Now Clonmel - Cork, Cork - Limerick, Limerick - Cork, Cork - Clonmel. While messy certainly aint 600 miles, unless they have moved Limerick since I was there last. I know they havent moved Cork cos I was only home a few days ago. Hmmmmmmm I suspect a little fabrication. Not important, just worth a mention.

The play of the night came towards the end and comes from someone who seems to think he's all that in Omaha. There are five in for the flop at €5. The flop comes down 3,3,10. Check, check, check, check.....POT! Ok €25. Now as everyone is folding the Ewok lets out a cry of despair after his pot bet dramatically hits the table!!!! Everyone who hasnt folded, fold instantly and we nearly piss our pants as the Brave young Ewok flips over his hand. 10, 3, 2 and hiding behind the little ducky was another little three. Bravo!!!!!!

So anyhoo the cash game breaks up after that and here I am sitting in this lonely card room with my laptop typing in everything that ye just saw tonight.... hang on a sec!!! Something's not right with that......Ah who cares!

love and muppets,
Caboose

*** Tip of the day; Winking at dealers is not an advised past time. It won't make you're cards any sweeter, you're not going to get a date (regardless of gender (well unless you are an oriental babe with the most amazing body. Then you might get a date!!!!!)) and well it makes you look like you want to be screwed in a very uncomfortable place.......like the back of a Volkswagon. It is a practice that should be banned before you're hurt.

Wednesday 30th May...Day3.....we land on enemy shores!

Wow for a night with no cash game it sure is late. Yup its 6 in the morning and I'm going home to get royally drunk. I swear i dont have a drinking problem. Just ever have one of those nights where you just need to get hammered????? You're in my state of mind!

Anyhoo we kicked off tonights festivities 10 handed. Your stars in order of appearance were Roadkill, The Causeway, The Pony express, Family Guy, The DIY man, The Quiet man, That bad guy from the new Bond film, The Mathematician, Old Father Time, Mr Lactose Intolerant. (Phew these names are tougher and tougher to come by and they're always long which doesnt make sense since I have to type them all out over and over again. I'll never learn).

Speed dealing brought us down to 7 in the third level. The DIY man was first to go claiming he didnt mind going home early. Wish granted then. We also lost the Bond villain and Mr Lactose Intolerant. Things kinda hit a bump for a while and some action boards brought no action. Of course on my one break, where I had to send a text, Old Father time flops quad tens and is checked all the way to the river until The Causeway decides to bet out! Ah well at least he didnt lose all his chips.

Three handed took forever until we lost old father time and he left mumbling about something but super dealing powers allow us to tune out to bad cards, how did he call and general bad beat talk so I was oblivious to the mumblings and to the stares that followed. God bless Super hero school!!! Heads up was between the Causeway and the Mathematician. It was pretty much looking to be a looooong heads up which I dont generally mind as long as there is some action!!!!!! But it did finally happen. The causeway got caught slowplaying a flopped two pair when The Mathematician hit a four card straight on the river with a 6 in hand to top it. So that was pretty much it. Done and dusted by midnight.

So what the hell am I doing here at 6 in the morning? Well I introduced Roadkill and Family Guy to a new game, a different version of rummy if you dont mind and each session takes a while. Needless to say we had 4 sessions. Which brings me to my first point; I need to get drunk. Yabba Dabba Darts is still breaking hearts. With €24 in the bank and one off mammoth darts I hit two mysteries in a row. Aint that a bitch!!!!!! Elvis is apparently filled up again from the accidental jackpot last night. I'll believe it when I see it.

Oh on yet another point. I was informed today that all you need is a Gmail account to leave a comment so if you have....then please please leave a comment. It gets lonely on here and sometimes I feel like I'm talking to myself. I am talking to myself aren't I? Allllo? Anybody?? Bloody philistines. I'm going home!

a very tired Caboose!

*** Tip of the day, Watch the Prestige. I meant to say it earlier but it came up in conversation tonight which reminded me.

Tuesday 29th. Day 2. We ship out..........

Update on yesterdays as Skid so gracefully reminded me. Regarding the hand that was posted yesterday. Remember? The one with the gutshot? Well there was also a flush out. So thank you Skid.

Some people (2) were asking how to leave comments on the Blog. You gotta register to this site first then you can leave comments. Alternatively you can mail them to me and I'll put them up. The address for the club is: kkcardclub@gmail.com

Right onto tonight or last night for those of you who live in the day time. Let me, once again, set the scene. The two televisions are blaring out Top Gear, Buzz is watching people crash spectacularly on the PC which is also loud. But above all this din the sweet dulcet tones of "Little less conversation little more action please" can be heard blaring from the machine room. Our new addition the Elvis fruit machine. Man its loud. It also has a jackpot of €250. It was only a few hours old and Family Guy "accidentaly" hit the jackpot. So now no ones going to play it for a month! Way ta go, muppet! How the hell do you accidentaly hit the jackpot??? I cant wait to hear this.

15 brave souls show for the tourney and in an early hand on my table, the 4th I think, we see a rematch between Buzz and the Good twin. The Flop comes 8,Q,10 all clubs. Oooh straight flush possibilty. The good twin bets out and Buzz calls. The turn brings an 8. This time the Good twin checks and Buzz bets out. The Good twin calls and the river comes yet another 8 (some dealer!!!!) this time the Good twin ships! He's got Buzz marginally covered and Buzz disappears into the Tank. He spends so long in there I assume he's met the semi Pro and they're having a coffee or something. He eventually declares that he cant fold and calls. He shows the Queen for the house. The Good Twin shows the Ace of clubs and mucks.

Past that there wasnt many surprises. A few suck outs but please this is a poker club. The final table looks like this; MC Hammer, The Fish, New friend, the Cyclist, Mr. Identity Crisis, Buzz, Babyface, Newbie # 2, and Roadkill. 2 go in the first level upon the return, the next level sees 1 more go and a further 2 drop the next level. The final five include; MC Hammer who I believe had Aces busted. Not bad considering he was on the brink at least 4 times. The Fish who had the chip lead when I left apparently got caught in Buzz's lobster pot. Newbie #2 was next in a hand that I have absolutely no idea what went on in. Which left New Friend and Buzz. Buzz takes the tourney and sweet sweet victory when his K6 paired against New Friends Q10 which I believed paired the 10.

In the meantime I'm over at what can only be described as a cash game. I'm pretty sure its a cash game. I have a float, a deck, a button, players with cash chips and the good ole familiar €1/€2 blinds. Yet I get a niggling sensation that Skid and Bob the Builder are playing their own game. Straddles include all in's and verbal "Go all in, I'll call blind". In short it was practice for the lotto tomorrow night. We had Bob the Builder, Babyface, Skid, Roadkill, Fish, The DIY man, Buzz and of course Family Guy. Buzz sits in with a few hands gone and after congratulatory slaps on the back and well dones he settles in by moving all in preflop on his first hand. Just after telling us how he waited patiently for the Fish and how he's perfected his paitience. The way Bob the Builder was playing there was no way he was going to fold and when he looked at his hand there was no doubt at all. So it was pocket 2's for Buzz and Big Chick for Bob. 2's held up!!!

Skid's phone rings and he declares that his next hand is his last hand. He very gently puts €100 in chips aside and claims that he's playing with the rest which is €14. I think we can all see where this is going. He raises preflop for the €14 and Babyface raises. After a bit of banter they're all in! Skid with Big Chick and Babyface with Sigfried and Roy. The case Ho hits the flop and its nighty night Skid.

Some think now that one lunatic has departed, under tragic circumstances, that the game might quieten down. If you believe that I'll sell you your own shoes and charge you extra for your socks. (It should be pointed out that the Good twin was wearing black socks tonight instead of his "girlfriend's" stripey ones. cough cough). Family guy and Bob start betting against each other blind the whole way. Bob gets the upperhand against Family Guy who busts out. But he's coaxed back in to play. At this stage its just Babyface, Roadkill (after getting another night of horrible beats and another cold deck), Bob the builder and Family guy. So Family guy buys in and decides to move seats. He does move chairs but he's in the exact same position as last time. Some times I do wonder. Roadkill succumbs to another batch of beats on a now round of each game and we're left with three. Family Guys moving of seats work as he is now winning hands. Blind of course. Bob eventually falls to the mighty onslaught of the blind play and thats all she wrote.

So there you have it. In a nutshell, good tourney, crazy cash game! Now I do believe I have another bottle of Kopparberg waiting for me at home, with no woman. If it appears that I have a drinking problem, well there's nothing much I can do about that really. I do have to get out of here tho as that bin is reeking of curry chips and sick and all as I am its bothering me.

So I'll leave you there.
love
your friendly
Caboose.

*** Tip of the day: Stay away from Elvis for a while. At least til Family Guy fills him back up. Ooooh sexual references abound!

Monday 28th......The League starts!!!!!!!

Ah! Yes this blog will be late but in fairness I do have a life outside the club….well ok that’s a bit of a stretch but as I write this I’m sitting in bed with a Kopparberg!!!! See it may be 7 in the morning to you but not for me. That’s me justifying it anyhoo. Just missing the beautiful woman and then I’m set to go. Anyhoo enough about me, on with the show.

First things first, TAP or the Andrex Puppy wanted to apply for a name change as it seemed uncool and, well, gay. Fair enough. I was stuck there for a while considering names. Spartan? Not everyone would get the Halo reference and would only drift back to 300, which is full of semi clothed men. More gay references, uhm nope! After running through a few more options, Rock, Ho Train, etc I decided to run the name off the cash game performance. So from this point on TAP shall be called Roadkill =o).

The tourney saw a small battlefield where eight Generals and one sergeant took part. In order of seating arrangements; Cobble Jnr, The Cyclist, The ever jovial Skid, The Good twin, Cobble, Geoff, Yours truly, Peter Griffin and Buzz Lightyear. Now one hand has to get a mention as I was roasted for it. I am generally known as a tight enough player, fair enough. I did get a bit of culture shock when I started playing outside Dublin and Cork as apparently any paint, regardless of kicker is seen as an all in hand (not to mention 10,3! 10,3!!!!!!!!! Some other time) so being an adaptive sort of bloke I changed my game accordingly. Here’s the hand:

My Big Blind, Family Guy raises, Geoff calls and I call with A5 of clubs.
Flop comes 3,3,4. (gutshot for me, put Family Guy on an overpair or AK and know Geoff has sweet FA)
I bet out a thousand (blinds are still only 150/300), Family Guy raises to 3,500 (or 4,500, can’t remember) and Geoff folds.
Here’s where things go wonky, normally I wouldn’t even have bet the thousand on the flop or called preflop. But when in Rome…. I call
Turn comes 7 and I check fully willing to surrender the hand at this point. Family guy checks!!!!!!!!!!! Happy birthday to me, free card.
Sure enough the river comes my beloved little ducky. I insta-ship! 4,100. Family Guy thinks for a while and calls. I call straight and he mucks. Hooks or Ladies can’t remember which.
Next thing I know Family Guy bitches about shocking play! (don’t check the turn next time bud and when I move all in I usually have it.) Geoff then turns on me for calling for a gutshot. Even Yoda was surprised. Hands up yes I called for a gut shot. I didn’t, however give myself a free card or make a call on a paired, straight board with an overpair. This being the first time a gutshot was ever called for in the club, of course. Thank you, the defence rests!

Another strange hand occurred between the Good twin and Buzz lightyear. Pocket ladies filled a set on the river to take down the hand but I think I had better let the two of them tell you how the betting went and why it went like it did. Twas odd though.

As the tourney went on luck reared its ugly head on many occasions for many people, myself included, until it came down to the Good Twin and myself. We struck a gentlemen’s accord and The Good Twin got the points for the victory.

Onto the cash game! This was the first night for the brand spanking new cash league. Hurrah! Since nearly everyone had fled to the hills we decided to have a nice intimate game. The Fish, Family Guy, Yoda (gone for more food!!) and Roadkill sat down and between the five of us we made the Good Twin buckle under pressure. Making it a round of each helped. The young Ewok came in but fled to greener pastures again! Come home soon we miss you.

The cash game was interesting to say the least. Draws were pushed and hit quite a bit in Omaha. Yoda cackled his way to hitting the nuts two hands in a row and Roadkill was well…..roadkill. Barn door, shotgun syndrome. He hit a good hand, someone hit a better hand and I believe there were two cooler hands involved as well. Cold decked, hate to see it happen. If its any consolation dude, someone sat in that chair after you and busted out about 5 times there.

Enter two new players who shall remain completely anonymous and the round of each became a NLH cash game. Family Guy, Road kill and the Good twin bowed out, gracefully in some cases, knocking over more tables in others, which left our two strangers, the Fish and Yoda. I kinda dozed off during this session but distinctly remember 8,3 poking its head up once or twice or twenty times. Once hitting runner runner for two pair, another just having the 3 pair was enough for a pot over €80!!! Good god. Yes my nose was rubbed in it and yes I still think its common as muck and shit. There I said it!!!! League amount was good for the first night considering the numbers. When the games pick up I can see a fairly decent sized prizepool in 3 months. Remember 50 hours gets you through!

Anyhoo me Kopparberg aint going to drink itself and well I think this rant, I mean Blog, is long enough. If you made it this far bless you little cotton socks. I’m off to watch some porn.

Nitey nite

Your friendly
Caboose.

*** Tip of the day: Under no circumstances should you every watch The Marine. Seriously don’t do it!! You have been warned.

Toodles

Sunday 27th....quiet cash game anyone?????

There we were settling down to a nice €1/€2 no limit holdem cash game. Or so I thought. How wrong can someone be..... I'm getting ahead of myself. Lets go back to the beginning. Let me paint you the picture.

Its sunday night, fairly quiet, no tournament so relying on a cash game to wyle away the hours. The weather outside has absolutely no relevance to this blog so it shall remain unknown. If you really wanna know, think back.....did you get wet? A few early stragglers come in, one goes for dinner and claims he'll be back in an hour. There's still no sign of him so needless to say we were sick with worry for the rest of the night. The Ornithologist comes in along with the self proclaimed Mr Nasty (who shall be referred to as the Andrex Puppy or TAP from this point forward). The young Ewok from Endor comes in and upon seeing no one wanting to give away their money, wants to flee to another small moon. Talk about your loyalty!!!!!! Anyhoo we send out communications to other members and Pinocchio walks in. We got us a cash game!!!! Yoda bravely steps up to "fill the numbers" with an evil glint in his eye!

We get underway with the new "world series quality cards". Which are promptly discarded after half an hour as not one of them resembles a flat, rectangular piece of plastic anymore! Ah good ole Copags. The evil twin comes in to fill the numbers as does mini Pinocchio whom we shall call Jimmny Cricket. Please note barring Don Santos and The evil twin there is no other person at this table over 5 feet tall. Barring me!!!!!! Pinocchio lives up to his name by claiming that he has been with most of the hot celebrities that appear on tv (god bless Minx) 2 years ago. By my count that means that he was with a very fit celebrity (and George Michael) every day of that year. Hmmmm.......

The action is good throughout the game and the usual suck outs and curses help carry us through the night. Along with the usual jokes and unusual stories, most of which are about other people in foreign locations. Then things take a turn for the strange. With four brave warriors left the normal €1/€2 blinds are, what you might call, shredded. The young Ewok gets a rush of blood to his head and straddles for €15. So now we have blinds that are €1/€2/€15. Sounds interesting until you realise that the €15 is raised 95% of the time. Then Don Santos and The young Ewok try and destroy Yoda's grasp on the force by out straddling each other. It went pretty much like this, if there were three players in the pot there would be around €15, this usually happened on Yoda's measely straddle which went to an all time high of €8. Yet a 2 way pot usually saw a flop for €80. Much scratching of head!!!!!

Not only were the straddles and blind a little...odd, so too were the plays and calls. A board which read A,K,X,6,K was betted by 8 2 off on the flop and called by 6 5 off!!!!! on the F-L-O-P!!!!!! All the chips were pretty much doing a tour of the table until only the Ewok and Yoda were left. Three hands of PLO were played and to fit in with the theme of craziness for the night the first hand was 13 card omaha. It only took about 15 minutes as both players couldnt even make out their hands. So we calmed down to 9 card omaha for the next hand. B-o-r-i-n-g. The last hand of the night was 21 card omaha, ditch 5 off the flop, 5 off the turn and 3 off the river!!!! Taken down by Yoda and a massive set of Aces!!!!!

Ahhhhhhh what a strange night. Now I have to go to Tescoes and walk around in a bewildered state at what I had just seen. Sunday nights....not a night to miss up here. God knows whats going to happen with the Omaha Tourney starting next sunday. I weep for the future.

your friendly
Caboose

It liiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiives!!!!!!!

Right then so here its is the official Blog for the club! Anyone want any rant or rave to be put up here by all means dont be afraid to mail me. Up to this point its been laughter and tears. Mostly tears though.

A few people came up to me wondering about a novelty tournament and to accommadate there will be a €25 double chance Pot Limit Omaha tourney every sunday. We'll try for a 9 start but I should really say half 8 as time keeping up this part of the country seems to be a foreign concept! The tourney will be part of the league. Whoo hoooo........

So other than that the week stays the same. Monday still boasts a €30 freezeout. It was on this faithful night where the poster "You must bet a Dead pot" came from. In a spectacular move a certain DIY man ships all in on the turn while another person was all in. The great Don Santos errupts like Mount Vesuvias and the whole world goes red. HULK SMASH!!!!! hadnt a patch on the blessed curse that was shouted from the top of the table. Needless to say DIY took it down and ran for a ciggie. If his picture starts popping up on milk cartons please provide any information that may prove useful.

Tuesday brings high and lows with a €20 freezeout. All the young guns are here. Battling out for the coveted 1st prize. Tensions are high as these future pros pitch wits across the blue fuzzy felt. Here the power of 65 off has been known to be just too much for some as they return home to their loved ones, scarred from battle and visibly shaken from a board that reads as follows: 4,7,8 rainbow while holding pocket Kings. War flashbacks are not uncommon!

Wednesday hails the middle of the week and an awesome €50 freezeout. It is here where you learn to wield your stack like a weapon, use it like a fortress and of course to bluff your opponent like the mommy's boy he is! This tourney usually takes a while as about midnight hot women in alluring clothing can be viewed on the Big screen as they gyrate to their own music. God bless Minx Uncut!!!!!!

Thursday is the warm up day, here players get themselves psyched up for the battle that follows the next day. Although this €25 freezeout attracts the more youthful player the quality is usually high until a rush of blood goes to the head and a brave person calls two all ins with 10 3 off suit. When asked why, "Value" was the only answer given. Heads have been scratched, oaths have been muttered but no solution has yet to present itself.

The highlight of the week comes in the shape of a €100 freezeout. The weakhearted need not apply. On this battlefield soldiers have been lost in the tank, tears have been shed and tables have been broken. Chairs have been known to be seeing flying through windows as bad beat after bad beat rears its ugly head and laughs.

Of course league points are available from all these great tournaments and the fight for top spot has gotten underway.

Cash games are the home of sniggering calls and "hard" laydowns. Of course if the board read 4,A,A and a hand was 4,2 then this could not possibly be seen as a hard laydown. In fact what the hell are you doing in the hand in the first place. The introduction of the new cash league will settle the men from the boys!!!!!!


Stay tuned for tales of the baddest of beats, of raising preflop for a reason and instructions on how not to bet a dead pot.


love your friendly
Caboose